Kiss Me, Not her
by moriartyswife
Summary: Igarashi and I had been friends since I could remember. When he first met Nana, I'd been afraid that he'd forget about me but that wasn't the case. Nana and I had clicked pretty quickly. Plus, I'd developed quite the crush on him. Now, the three of us were inseparable. Until they find a new girl to spend all their time with. (Kiss Him, Not Me fanfic)
1. Chapter 1

I'm late!

Again.

How does this keep happening to me?

I slid my shoes on and ran out the door to meet Igarashi at the gate entrance of my house. The wind blew steadily, making me cringe with how short my skirt was today. I lived alone so sometimes things get out of hand when it comes to things like… laundry… cleaning…dishes… anything that parents normally do really. If Igarashi's mom didn't offer to buy my groceries with my mom's credit card… I'd probably starve.

"Running late again?" Igarashi asked, his school bag hanging from one hand and his soccer bag slung over his shoulder. He raised his eyebrows. "Nice skirt."

I let my head drop in defeat. "I forget to get the laundry out of the washer last night so my uniform skirt was still soaked this morning. This skirt from middle school is all I have in school colors… but it's too short!" I groaned, tugging at the hem. Just my luck.

Igarashi tried to hold back his laughter but couldn't contain it for a very long. I glared and punched him in the arm. "I'm sorry, Kari. You gotta admit it's a little funny."

Shaking my head, I replied, "What am I supposed to do? Everyone's going to notice, and this wind is not helping." I wasn't comfortable with the possibility that the whole school might see my underwear. I'm going to die of embarrassment.

He stopped laughing and just smiled. "So, I'll walk behind you. No big deal." Igarashi took my hand and pulled me in front of him. "See? No one will notice."

For the first time this morning, I smiled. Igarashi and I had been friends since I could remember. He'd always lived across the street and we were practically the only kids in the neighborhood. Since we were in elementary school, he'd walked me to school. He was kind of like the big brother I never had, even though we were the same age.

My nerves went through the roof when we made it to the entrance gate to the school. A few people were staring but mostly I went unnoticed… until we ran into Nana who was waiting at the one of the front doors for us. His casual wave turned into a sly smirk and a laugh. Just great…

"Hey Kari, nice skirt," Nana commented.

My cheeks flushed. "Not so loud, Nana. I don't want everyone to know."

"I'm pretty sure every guy here has notice—ouh!" Nana rubbed his head where Igarashi had hit him. "What the hell, man?"

Igarashi rolled his eyes. "You're embarrassing her."

I held my hands up. "It's fine. Can we just go to class?" They argued a lot but it was like… friendly. Igarashi and Nanashima were really good friends. When Igarashi first met him, I'd been afraid that he'd forget about me but that wasn't the case. Nana and I had clicked pretty quickly. Plus, I'd developed quite the crush on him. Now, the three of us were inseparable.

"I have to meet the team for a quick minute. Nana will walk behind you to class so no worries, okay?" Igarashi said with a smile.

"I will?"

"Yes. Just do it. See you guys in class," Igarashi waved as he walked away toward the boy's locker room for the soccer team.

"After you," Nana said and gestured for me to go first. As he walked behind me, he flipped my ponytail a few times. "Sometimes I wonder how you survive living alone with how forgetful you are."

I tried to focus on my steps instead of the boys that stared at me as we passed. They were whispering to each other and grinning. This is awful.

"Ignore them." Nana pushed on my back when I stopped. "I like the skirt."

I blushed and stared at the floor. "You do?" That wasn't surprising but just hearing him say it made my heart race. I knew why girls fell for him. I was the first. Nana had no idea the effect he had on me.

"Of course, I do. It's hot." Nana answered as we entered the classroom. All eyes fell on me. Narrowing his eyes, he said, "Mind your own business."

When I sat down, the skirt rode up even more. Tugging at it did no good. The two boys that sat in front of me, Takeshi and Futo where whispering but I could still hear them. Nana was off flirting with some girl who smiled and twirled her hair.

"She's always been hot but that?" Futo said.

"She's totally asking for it. What are the odds that I can talk her into the janitor's closet?" Takeshi replied, blatantly staring at me.

"Man, you have to share! That's not fair!"

Mortified, I laid my head on my desk. They only stopped talking when Igarashi and Nana came to their seats.

"Kari, you okay?" Igarashi asked.

Before the teacher started to talk, I answered, "I'm going to the bathroom." I couldn't get out of the room quick enough. The hallways were clear of students so I didn't have to worry. Boys were so disgusting.

Instead of going to the bathroom, I decided to cut class and go up to the rooftop. Thankfully, it was empty too. From up here, I could see the first years on the soccer field. The city around the school buzzed with life. One day, I wanted to see this view in the dark, while the city was asleep.

"There you are," A voice said from behind me.

I thought it was Igarashi but when I turned around, I was face to face with Takeshi, grinning again. Behind him, Futo stood with a similar grin. Takeshi stepped forward and backed me against the fence. The broken pieces sticking out dug into my skin.

"Leave me alone," I replied with a cracking voice.

"Don't worry babe. We know why you wore that skirt," Takeshi said, grabbing my wrists and holding them above my head. He pushed his leg in between mine to keep me from kicking him.

I tried anyways, not caring about the piece of wire that cut into the back of my thigh. "Let me go! Please!"

"Your precious Nanashima and Igarashi aren't here to defend you," Futo spit out. He hesitantly reached for me. Laughing like a schoolboy, he squeezed my breast.

As much as I struggled, nothing helped. "Stop!" I shouted, finding my voice. No one would know I was gone until after gym. Even then, would they know I was up here? I shut my eyes.

"You're weak without them," Takeshi whispered into my ear and then kissed me rough. He held the back of my head with his free hand so I couldn't stop it. He shoved his tongue into my mouth, leaving the nasty taste of orange juice and stale pop tarts.

"The lady said for you to stop," A new voice came from behind both of them. I recognized him. Akine Minozuno. He was a third year who had a reputation for picking fights, though he was well liked by most of the students. He pushed his hand through his messy black hair after dropping his cigarette. "Get lost before I kick your asses off this roof." He snuffed out the cigarette with his boot.

Takeshi let me go. He and Futo practically ran for the door. I held my skirt down as the wind blew. "Thank you," I said, trying to keep standing. Blood dripped down my leg from the cut. It hurt to even put pressure on that leg.

Akine scooped me up, like I weighed nothing, and headed for the door. "I'll take you to the infirmary."

If it had been anyone else, I would have protested, but it hurt so bad that I didn't. He effortlessly carried me down the stairs in silence. I hadn't expected anyone to be on the roof but I was overjoyed that he had been. He probably doesn't even know how much it means to me.

"Nanashima fell on me in the gym but it's no big deal! I'm okay," Serinuma said, talking to Mutsumi, another third year. Her eyes fell on me. "Oh my god, Kari! What happened?"

"She fell on the roof. No idea what the hell she was trying to do," Akine said with a laugh. He had a smile on his face. The badass guy from the upstairs had completely melted away. "She cut her leg. You're on the health committee, right?"

"Yes! Shinomiya is good with bandages. He should be able to patch you right up!" Serinuma lead the way.

A first year narrowed his eyes when we entered. "I thought I told you that the infirmary was for actual patients?"

"Kari has a big cut on her leg. Can you treat her?" Serinuma asked. She acted like she hadn't just been insulted by a first year. That's what I liked about her. She was kind and it didn't matter what she looked like.

Shinomiya gathered some first aid things and sat in a rolly chair. He worked quietly, cleaning the wound, wrapping it up, and wiping the blood that dripped down my leg off. "There. You should stay off it for long periods of time for the rest of the day and tomorrow."

"Thank you," I smiled and attempted an awkward bow. I wasn't sure but I thought he might be blushing. Akine left me to go to his class without so much as a goodbye. Instead, I walked back to class with Serinuma and Amane.

Opening the classroom door, Igarashi was the first to see us. "She's awake! You okay?"

I slipped by, starting to go back to my seat. Takeshi and Futo were both back, staring me down. This time they looked mad. I was pretty much frozen for a solid minute before I finally got the courage to walk back to the back of the room. Instead of sitting, I opted for staring out the window.

Typical Nana. I heard the whole class laugh when he called Serinuma a human cushion. Igarashi lost his shit over that. At least they balanced each other out. Igarashi apologized for Nana and they came back to where I was.

"What happened to your leg?" Igarashi asked.

"Nothing major. I'm fine," I answered, forcing myself to smile. There was no way I could tell them about what happened. Not only would they be pissed, but they'd probably commit murder. At least they cared.

"She probably fell again," Nana rolled his eyes and sat down at his desk.

Igarashi didn't have time to press the issue. The teacher asked everyone to sit down. I was grateful for that because Igarashi knows me well. So well, that he might have seen through my lies to his never-ending questions. I sighed and rested my chin on my hand. The day was almost over. I could home and try to sort out what happened. Or… that's what I had been hoping.

The bell rang and Nana stood up. "Looks like I'm walking you home since Igarashi has practice."

Fantastic.


	2. Chapter 2

Nana walked behind me with his fingers laced behind his head. He talked about school and didn't seem to register that my answers were short and I was not interested. Once we got far enough away from school, my mind stopped focusing on everyone around me, and began to sort through what happened on the roof. "You skipped gym today. Igarashi covered for you."

"Good. I'd hate to have another missed gym class on my record." The sarcasm in my voice made him laugh. I had skipped gym more times than I'd attended. The class bored me because one, I wasn't good at any sports, and two, when I tried to participate, someone always ended up hurt. That someone usually was me.

We fell into a comfortable silence the rest of the way to my house. Turning the corner onto my street, two boys stood at the entrance gate of my house. Takeshi and Futo. My stomach jumped up into my throat. Why are they here? When I stopped, Nana ran into me.

"What are you doing?" Nana asked, annoyed. It wasn't until he walked around me that I realized he wasn't talking to me. "The hell are you two doing here?" No one really liked either of those boys, but Nana had always been at odds with them.

Takeshi shrugged. "Forgot Igarashi had practice today." He and Futo passed us on the street, giving me dirty looks.

My legs moved before my mind. Running past Nana, I ran my door. My keys fell out of my shaking hand as I pulled them out of my bag. "Dammit," I cursed under my breath. I knew they were gone, but it didn't help to shake the feeling that they were here to hurt me.

"What's wrong with you?" Nana asked, stooping down to pick up my keys. The door swung open and he went straight for my kitchen. "You hungry?" This boy was always hungry. I had no idea where he stored half the food he ate.

I stood in the living room and watched him. He'd been here so much that he knew where everything was. After he'd heated up some leftover pasta, he set it on the coffee table to cool before collapsing on the couch. Stirring my fork around in my bowl, I halfway listened to him tell me about what happened with Serinuma in gym class. Concentrating became hard. All my head could focus on was what would have happened if I'd walked home alone.

I set the bowls in the sink before returning to living room. Nana grabbed my arms, pulling me down on to his lap. "You're acting weird." When I didn't answer, he reached up to touch my hair, saying, "You have the prettiest black hair."

Still trapped in my nervous state, I squeezed my eyes closed and turned my head away.

"Kari… Did you think I was going to hurt you?" His words came out slow. We'd gotten past the awkward stage of our strange relationship. Nana and Igarashi were the two I trusted the most in my life.

The confusion and anger on his face made me sad. "No… I just-" I can't tell him what happened with those two… I know he would overreact. The wheels turned in his head as he tried to puzzle out why I'd reacted that way.

"Was it those two? Takeshi and Futo? What did they do to you?" Nana asked, anger in his voice. "You have to tell me."

"Nothing, it's nothing."

"Is that how you cut your leg?"

"Nana, please!" I couldn't even begin to tell him what happened. If he knows, then Igarashi will find out, and then they'll both end up in prison. That's how I knew this would end.

Nana stopped questioning me and took my hands. "You're shaking."

I let out a shaky breath. "This is so stupid. I don't want to think about it right now." I need a distraction.

"Okay then." Nana kissed me.

It startled me and the image of Takeshi forcing his kiss on me came back. This wasn't the same. I know that. He isn't here. He can't hurt me right now. That didn't stop the memory from taking over and paralyzing me.

"Kari," Nana rested his forehead against mine. "Who are you with?"

I took a deep breath. "You."

"Would I ever hurt you?"

"No." This was something he used to do a lot when we first started sleeping together. Like then, he wasn't impatient. He didn't push me too hard. It never felt like I had to be a certain way or pretend to be in a state that I wasn't.

"Good, because I wouldn't. Ever," he said. His green eyes met my purple ones, still waiting for me.

He won't hurt me. I repeated it over and over in my head until finally the thought registered. Occupying my mind would do me some good. Finally, I leaned forward and kissed him. Nana and I had been friends who sort of look like they're dating but really not. Acting like a couple…

After a while, I thought this might turn into something more, but Nana didn't push it. Instead, he insisted I go take a bath to relax while he made me some real dinner. So, I did. The warm, bubbly water helped. Sweatpants hurt my leg so I opted for shorts and tank top.

As I got to the bottom of my stairs, I could hear Nana talking with someone. "Hey," I said from the doorway to the kitchen. Igarashi stood beside him, and they'd been keeping their voices down. I hoped that Nana hadn't said anything to him about Takeshi and Futo.

He smiled. "Hey yourself. How's your leg?"

"It's okay. Wanna wrap it for me? I failed in my attempt upstairs," I said, offering the bandage and wrap out.

With a laugh, Igarashi knelt down and started to wrap my wound. Nana, on the other hand, stared at me. He wanted me to say something about what I'd said. Shaking my head, I tried not to make it too obvious that I didn't want that. I already had Nana to worry about. Let's not drag Igarashi into the mix. "All done," Igarashi said, standing back up.

Thankfully, Igarashi didn't seem to notice our subtle exchanges. He stayed to eat, and kept the conversation going. I still couldn't stomach much food. I'm sure he noticed that, but he didn't comment on it. Finally, Igarashi went home, leaving Nana and me alone again. Now, I should avoid him until I go to bed, but he followed me around like a lost puppy, and insisted on staying the night.

"Kari," Nana sat on the edge of my bed, watching me in the bathroom.

I had a routine. Brush teeth. Put hair up. Wipe the makeup off. But I ignored him.

"Kari," This time he whined. "Please tell me what happened. It's killing me."

Sighing, I said, "Fine. Let me finish this first." I had to tell him eventually. We had no secrets, and this one was already half out. So, I sat down on the bed with him and through my crying, I told him the whole story.

Nana didn't get mad. He didn't curse them or threaten to kill. Instead, he held onto me while we fell asleep. It was a little weird. I'd never seen Nana this calm after I'd confessed something to him. He slammed a boy's face into the locker three times for them calling me names. This boy had no off switch that I knew of. But as I fell asleep, he stayed calm. The next morning at school, however…


	3. Chapter 3

Igarashi met us at the gate, making no comment about Nana staying the night at my house. It had become a normal thing. Igarashi was probably glad it was Nana, and not some strange boy he didn't know. The problem this morning was that Nana had been quiet, barely speaking to anyone. Since the moment I woke up, he gave short answers, not really present. For once, I had to carry the conversation in order to keep the topic off Nana's quietness. Igarashi had always told me that he could pick up on Nana's mood easily, and he finally asked, "What's wrong with you?"

Nana shrugged, giving a flippant reply. "Thinking."

"You? Really?" Igarashi wasn't buying it.

"Yeah."

Turning his head, Igarashi gave me an inquisitive look. I shrugged, too. There's no way I can tell him about those boys. Nana was already freaking me out with his silence. Out of the two of them, he always took the action first, thinking about it later. Now all of sudden, he's taking it slow? This cannot be good.

Sliding the classroom door open, Nana's gaze zeroed in on Takeshi, who sat in his desk. Before I could stop him, he'd shoved the desks aside, getting the whole room's attention. Grabbing Takeshi by the collar, it seemed like Nana might kill him!

"What the hell, man?" Takeshi asked, struggling against him, attempting to be brave. However, his hands shook in fear. He knew what this was about. The bastard played dumb, trying to get out of this situation somehow.

Igarashi grabbed Nana's arm. "Nana!"

The whole room went silent, waiting for what would happen next. Their eyes moved between them and me, who stood at the front of the class, paralyzed.

"If you EVER touch Kari again, I will END you! You got that?" Nana yelled, jerking Takeshi back and forth.

Igarashi let go of his friend, turning his eyes on me. The realization of what has happened just hit him. "What?" His voice turned as deadly as Nana's. Cracking his knuckles, he backed Futo into the corner.

Futo held up his hands. "W-we won't do it again! Swear!"

All I could think about was Takeshi's words. Nana and Igarashi had always protected me. What would I do if they weren't around? I stepped out of the way when Takeshi and Futo went running out of the room, cursing under their breaths.

Igarashi wrapped his arms around me, rubbing my back. "Why didn't you tell me? Is that how you cut your leg?" The class began to settle down, returning to their own conversations.

"Yeah, I went to the roof for some air… and… they followed." The tears that sprang to my eyes were hard to hold back. When I looked around, I realized that they were both shielding me from view. No one in the classroom could see me. They're always keeping me safe… That made me cry even more. Holding onto him tightly, I took a few minutes to calm myself down, listening to his heartbeat.

After I'd calmed down, Igarashi asked, "Better?"

I took one last deep breath. "Thank you."

Since we were kids, Igarashi had always been there for me to calm my panic attacks. I'd gained more control over them, not breaking down into tears over everything, like I used to. Still, it comforted me to know that he's always here for me. No matter what happened, I had him… and Nana.

For the next week, neither Takeshi nor Futo were at school. Rumor was they got suspended for sexual harassment. Nana and Igarashi also got extra clean-up duty for three days for starting a fight, but the punishment was lenient in light of what happened. Apparently, Akine had given a statement to the principal, giving a second witness to what happened.

Finally, it had all died down, and no one talked about it anymore. Standing in the hallway, Akine approached me, escaping his horde of fangirls that were fawning over him. He flashed me a charming grin. "How's the leg?"

"It's all healed now. There's just a small scar. Oh, I never thanked you for stopping them. I try not imagine how differently that situation could have gone, if you hadn't stepped in." Those thoughts plagued my nightmares. Takeshi's rough hands on my body… his sloppy kiss. It disgusted me.

Akine leaned back against the window sill, nodding his head in thought. "Guys like them piss me off." He turned his gaze out the window, down toward the courtyard below us. "Heard your boyfriend had a fight with them."

I blinked. "Boyfriend?"

"Yeah, the blond one. He left the school with you that day."

My cheeks grew hot. "Nana isn't my boyfriend." I only wished that to be true. "I live alone, and after I told him everything, I asked him to stay with me, just in case. It's nothing more than him being a good friend." Nana as my boyfriend? I could squeal at that title.

Akine shrugged with a smile. "You like him, don't you?"

My whole face felt hot. "N-no! We're just friend. Just… friends." Those words made my heart ache. Starring at the floor, I had to swallow down the lump in my throat. Who am I trying to convince? Me or him?

"Right. What was I thinking?" His tone was laced with sarcasm, but he laughed, and patted my head. The bell rang. "See you around, Kari." Akine strolled off, back into the clutches of some of his classmates, eager to walk with him to their classroom.

Returning to my own class, it seemed I had missed an important event. Kae Serinuma had returned, and she'd lost a lot of weight. Everyone was in an uproar. We'd been in the same class for a while, having attended the same junior high. I'd always thought her to be a nice girl, a little anti-social, but she had a kind heart. Now, Kae looked radiant. Tilting my head to the side, I laughed to myself. "And uncomfortable."

The whole day it seemed liked everyone couldn't believe their eyes Boys who had never payed attention to her before, were fighting to speak to her. By the end of the day, I couldn't wait to get out of here and not listen to the rumors being spread about Kae. Retrieving my shoes from my locker, Nana abandoned me for that girl. He, Igarashi, and two others were all trying to talk to her.

"Shouldn't you be more worried about walking home Kari?" Nana asked, hints of anger in his voice. It was rare for them to fight over a girl, but when they did, things could go south pretty quickly.

Igarashi laughed. "I'm not the one who spends night after night at her house."

This. This is why I hate when they fight over a girl.

Smacking them both on the back of the head, I folded my arms. "I can walk myself home. If you're going to fight, don't bring me into it. Why don't you all go out together? Can't you see you're making her uncomfortable?" What am I even saying? Do I really want Nana to go out with some other girl?

Turning on my heel, I tried to walk about of the building with my head up. As soon as I got out of sight, I smacked my hands against my face. "Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! Why did I suggest that?! Ugh! I'm such an idiot!" Kicking my foot against the nearby wall, I bit my tongue to keep from screaming. Bad idea! Wiping away a stray tear off my cheek, I pulled myself together. "Right. I should go out tonight, too."

If I had any other friends other than Igarashi and Nana.

A familiar laugh caught my attention. Across the street, Akine walked beside another boy, intently listening to the boy speak. They were walking away from the campus. My legs moved before my mind, darting across the street. By the time I reached them, my breaths were heavy. Damn, I am so not in shape. "A-Akine!" Bending over with my hands on my knees, I took deep breaths.

"Hey, what's up?" He asked, casually, like we had done this a million times before.

I looked up at him, a little put off by his tone. "Um…" What the hell am I supposed to say? Girls don't ask guys out, and I don't want him to think this is romantic in any way.

His friend smacked his arm. "You didn't tell me you knew any cute girls! Invite her to the party."

Akine raised an eyebrow at him, and shook his head once. "I don't think she'd want-"

"I want to!" I cut him off. Both of the boys looked at me. His friend had chestnut brown hair, and was tall and lanky, but he seemed older than Akine. He isn't wearing our uniform either. Maybe he's a college student. "I mean," I bit my lip. "I was going to ask if you wanted to hang out tonight."

"Well, pretty lady, you're welcome to come as Akine's date. It'll be a blast, promise. My name is Mori Ueno," Mori said, stuffing his hands in his pockets and grinning. "I'll see you tonight then." He nodded his head at Akine and strolled off, whistling to himself.

Akine put his hand on my forehead, a smirk popping up on his face. "You feeling okay, Kari? Your boyfriend… excuse me, not boyfriend, probably wouldn't approve of you going to a college party." He laughed.

I blushed, standing up straight. "Don't worry about him. He's going on a date tonight." With three other boys, but let's not put that detail in there. I already feel pathetic enough.

"So are you," Akine said, holding out his hand to me.

My eyes went wide with excitement and happiness. "R-really?" I closed my mouth tightly for a moment. Idiot. "I can't wait." That's better. I took his hand, getting more nervous by the second.

This would be my first time doing anything remotely wild. I'd never been invited to a party ever, let alone a college party. Taking one last look back at the school, where I knew Nana and Igarashi were arguing over their newfound puppy love of Kae, I resolved myself. Tonight, is going to be fun. I'm going to allow myself to have fun with new people. Who knows, maybe this could be the start of something better for me!


	4. Chapter 4

11:00 PM

Loud.

That's the word I'd use to describe this party. Music blasted in the basement, shaking the floor underneath my feet. The door that led down there had been propped open and the melody of some pop song blared from the depths. There are a lot of people here, ranging from teenagers like myself, to some who looked to be in their late twenty's. Everyone mingled with their own cliques, while I stood off in the corner, trying not to be in the way. Akine had left me some time ago. Some girl he knew had pulled his attention away from me. I didn't mind, because I wasn't interested in Akine romantically. We were just friends, and he had no obligation to stay with me.

But being here all alone was overwhelming.

I chewed on my lip, scanning the sea of people for a familiar face. Mori made eye contact with me and his face lit up with happiness. Slipping away from the group he was with, he strode up to me. "Kari! I'm glad you made it. You look good," Mori said, his eyes roaming down my body. "If you need anything, let me know."

Akine had found this dress in my closet. A lacey, black dress with off-the-shoulder straps. I stopped him before he got away. "Actually… Akine left with some girl, and I don't know anyone else here." I felt pathetic, and I'm sure that he doesn't want some high school girl hanging around him all night.

"Say no more, my lady. Come with me," Mori replied, putting his arm around my shoulder to guide me through the crowd. We went straight for the table of beverages. Tapping his finger on his chin, he released me long enough to mix some of the things together. "Here, try this." He held the cup up to my lips, tilting it to let the liquid pour into my mouth.

It should have tasted bitter from what I know about alcohol, but it was sweet. My eyes must have shown my surprise because Mori laughed. My cheeks grew hot, but I licked the sweet drops off my lips. "It's not what I expected," I said, allowing myself to laugh as well. There's no need to be uptight. I should enjoy my time with new people.

Mori gave the cup to me and took my free hand. "I happen to be an expert cocktail mixer. From my experience, I've learned that girls tend to like the sweeter drinks." He led me down a long hallway and into the almost deserted kitchen. A group of five boys were leaning against various appliances, having an intense discussion about some sports team. All eyes turned to us. "This is Kari. Take good care of her for me okay? I've got to go check on the upstairs…situation."

Whatever he'd meant, they all showed an understanding. Without Mori's presence, I felt as though I'd just stepped into the lion's den. The room was quiet for a moment before the tallest boy with glasses and curly brown hair came over to push me forward, toward the center of the kitchen. "Come on in. We don't bite. I'm Hideki," he said with a laugh. "You're the girl who came in with Akine, right?"

I nodded my head, unable to come up with any words. They were a rag-tag bunch, all different ages and styles of dress. We were alone in the kitchen, with the heavy door pushed closed to block out all the noise from the rest of the house. Part of me was sure that no one would hear me if I screamed. My heart pounded in my chest and I took a long gulp of the drink Mori gave me. It made my head swim. All of my worries about Takeshi and Futo were nothing compared to what I felt in the moment.

All five of the boys were watching me with curious expressions, and even whispering to each other and laughing. "So, Kari," Hideki said, causing me to jump in fear. "What year are you?"

I blinked, a little confused at the normal question. "S-second year."

"Ahh youth," the boy leaning against the refrigerator said dramatically. "I'm a fourth-year student, on my way to graduation at the end of the year. What I wouldn't give to go back to my high school glory days." His black hair was slicked up with gel to make it spiky in the front, and a playful smirk grew on his lips.

Hideki rolled his eyes. "You mean the days of your suspensions? Because you got in trouble daily, Keishi." The chastising tone in his voice reminded me of a parent scolding a child.

"Dude, not cool," Keishi said, glaring at the other boys who were laughing at him.

My whole body began to relax out of it's tense state. They were just like boys at my school. Immature. Making fun of each other but always keeping it light and friendly. They were different than I imagined. I'd made judgments before knowing them. The more I drank, the more open I felt, and the more I learned about the boys in the room.

Hideki Koybayashi: A repeat third year college student. He knocked his girlfriend up two years ago, and she'd left last year to go overseas to study abroad, so he took off a year of school to take care of his now two-year-old daughter, Hinami. Now that his girlfriend had returned, he'd resumed his studies to become a teacher. It fit him well, as the others referred to him as the dad of the group, since he is always wearing cardigans.

The boy standing closest to me had dyed his hair a deep blue color and wore oversized glasses with black frames. Ichiro Sasaki: Also, a second year, but he was only 18, fresh out of high school. He'd passed a lot of prep classes and got to skip his first year of college. His friends called him a genius, but… "Just between us," Ichiro said, placing his arm around my shoulders to pull me close. He leaned down to whisper in my ear. "I'm only studying psychology, so I can self-diagnose why I have a fear of small animals. Turns out, I'm pretty crappy at helping other people."

Keishi grinned at me. "Want to see a magic trick?" He pulled a deck of playing cards from his pocket, and the others groaned in annoyance. "Oh shut up. Let me show the lady some real magic." He began to show me a trick. Keishi Kimura: The orchestrator of all the best campus parties, and resident prankster of the frat house. His girlfriend apparently doesn't mind his antics, so long as he isn't doing it to her. He says she scares easy and he hates to make her cry. He's also a magician on the side while he's studying to be a lawyer. His card trick impressed me, and he bowed dramatically as I clapped.

The next one was sitting at the table, his phone lit up with a basketball game playing. Noboru Fujita: a first year, and newly accepted into the fraternity. He got accepted to this school on a sports scholarship for basketball. He's a great player, but mediocre at school. Hideki has been tutoring him. His shaved head and stocky build gave him an intimidating demeanor, but his friends called him a romantic.

Lastly, the boy sitting up on the counter had black hair with bangs that covered one of his eyes. Tomio Chiba: He didn't talk much, only really speaking to throw in a sarcastic comment or two. He's a second year but hasn't picked his field of study. When the conversation died down, his steel blue eyes fell on me. "Why did you come to a college party? You seem like a nice girl and all, but you look sad. Is it a boy?"

I stared down at my empty cup, all the pent-up emotions coming up. All of them were quiet, waiting for me to speak. Swallowing down the lump in my throat, I nodded my head. "Yeah, kind of."

Keishi refilled my cup with whatever alcohol he found in the refrigerator. "We're good problem solvers. If you want to talk about, that is."

Swishing the liquid around the cup, I chewed on my lip. "What about Mori? You all seem to know him well."

A sly smirk grew on Keishi's face. "Oh ho, someone is interested in the mysterious charmer. He's a first-year college student, and his field of study is a secret known only to those close to him. He doesn't like to be talked about when he isn't here. But, didn't you come with Akine?"

"Yeah, but he ditched me for another girl. Just like…" I sighed, trailing off. Taking a huge drink from the cup, it scorched my throat. This wasn't a mixed drink. This was straight alcohol. The more of it I drank, the more open I became. They all seemed to be waiting for me to speak again.

For whatever reason, I wanted to tell them. It could be that this beverage that burned my throat as it went down was going to my head, or it could be that telling strangers about my sad love life would somehow make the pain go away. I told them all about Nana, without mentioning his name. He isn't a bad guy. He just doesn't know my feelings for him, though I've tried to make it obvious with my actions. "And now he's on a date with another girl."

A collective gasp from the boys around me.

"He did not!" Hideki said, his eyes wide with surprise.

Keishi had a similar expression but his eyebrows pulled together in anger. "He ditched you for another chick? That's just wrong. You could do so much better than him."

Tears sprang to my eyes. "I've been in love with him for so long that I have no idea what to do." Dropping my head to stare at the floor, I couldn't stop the tears. Covering my eyes with my arm to shield my face from view, I started to mutter an apology. They shouldn't have to deal with my problem.

"Awe, hey, don't cry," Ichiro said, moving forward to engulf me in a hug. The others followed suit.

Being at a college party was much different than I imagined, especially being squished in the middle of five boys. Ichiro was petting my head and they were all speaking at the same time. Saying that it'll get better. They don't want me to be sad. Noboru offered to beat him up for me. That made me laugh and they all released their tight grip, but still stayed circled around me. "It hasn't gotten that bad. He doesn't know that I like him."

"What? You've got to tell him. He won't know because guys don't pick up on girl's hints. We're all idiots!" Keishi said, patting my head. He titled his head to the side. "Your mascara is running." Before I could reach my hands up to attempt to wipe it away, Keishi dug in his pocket, pulling out a stick of mascara. "Tomio throw me a damp towel," Keishi ordered. "Look up, sweetheart. I got this." He wiped away the black smudges around my eyes and expertly applied the black mascara to my eyelashes. "There. Done. My girlfriend cries at all the sad movies, so I learned to carry this, and I can even apply it in the dark."

"Now that's a magic trick," Hideki said, causing all of us to laugh.

Tomio had a small ghost of a smile on his lips. "Call him and tell him how you feel."

"R-right now?" It made sense, for once. Of course, I should call him right now. He's out with some girl that he barely spoke to before she lost all her weight. That's stupid. He should know that all I've ever wanted was for him to notice me as more than a friend with benefits. "Is there somewhere quiet I can go?"

"Mori's room is on the top floor at the end of the hall. It's usually locked, but I swiped his spare key earlier," Keishi grinned. Another magic trick, probably. He placed the key in my hand. "Lock it behind you so that no one will bother you. We'll be here when you come back, and you can tell us what happened."

I thanked them for listening to me before going up to the top floor of the house. Various noises could be heard from the bedrooms, some video games, others moaning. The last room was locked, and I assumed it to be Mori's. The key worked, and I slipped inside. The room was much more organized than I thought a boy's room would be. Minimally decorated, but he had a good collection of books on his shelf. The bed was neatly made, and nothing looked out of place. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I stared at the phone screen with Nana's name and number on it. What do I have to lose? If he rejects me, at least I can try to move on.

Just do it, Kari.

So, my finger slipped the first time, but I hit the call button and let the phone ring.


	5. Chapter 5

5:00 AM

Sleepiness hung over me as I tried to pry my eyes open. When had I fallen asleep? What's that annoying sound? After a few more seconds it stopped, and I could almost fall back into a peaceful slumber. My body felt warm, and comfortable. The noise started up again, and it hit me that it was my ringtone. My eyelids barely lifted up and in front of me was a person. I was tangled up in the sheets with Mori. Naked. "Oh no. What… what did I do?" I whispered, my head spinning from sitting up too fast.

"Your phone," Mori mumbled.

It was Igarashi. I had fifteen missed calls from him. Hitting the green phone icon, I held the bright screen up to my ear. "Kari! Where the hell are you? You left me that message and you sounded drunk. I'm at you house and you aren't here."

His raised voice hurt my head. "Could you not… be so loud. It's hurting my head."

"Because you're hungover!" He shouted, clearly unhappy with me.

Mori pulled the phone out of my hand. "Listen, man, you shouldn't be harassing the lady. I'll be driving her home soon enough." He ended the call and dropped the phone on his chest, collapsing back against the bed. He rubbed his face with his hands. "Akine is going to be so pissed at me. Please at least tell me you remember doing this."

I nodded. "When I first woke, I was confused, but now…" The haze was going away and the memories of what happened were returning to me. I had called Nana and left a voice message. In my drunken state, when Mori came stumbling into the room, my sadness had overwhelmed me. Trying to comfort me, he held me in his arms. Then… I guess I was so mad at Nana for not answering or returning my feelings, I kissed Mori. And the rest is too embarrassing to think about.

"Do you regret it?" He asked, locking his hands behind his head. It seemed like it had meant nothing to him.

I shrugged my shoulders. "Not really," I answered honestly. What does it matter? The boy I loved had made his choice to go on a date with another girl. He's investing his time into someone else. So why can't I? "I'd be grateful if you would drive me home, now, though." Igarashi would come looking for me if I didn't return home soon.

Mori nodded his head with a lazy smile. "Sure thing, Kari. Let's get dressed first." He pulled the covers off him, not bothered by the fact that he was naked. Sliding on his sweatpants, he yawned as he disappeared into the bathroom.

The room felt cold on my bare skin. Rubbing my freezing arms, I searched the floor for my clothes. The previous night in here had returned completely. It was consensual. Mori had asked me over and over if I was sure that I wanted to do it. I agreed each time. Why doesn't it bother me? Isn't it supposed to be meaningful? I sighed, "What do I know."

"Ready to go?" Mori emerged from the bathroom, completely dressed and put together. His hair had been styled and he'd put on clean clothes, while I had on the same thing I'd worn the day before, and my hair was piled on top of my head in a messy bun. He wasn't bothered by my appearance, holding the bedroom door open for me.

My head still pounded on the ride back to my house, and my stomach churned, threatening to vomit from the motion. Mori only spoke when he needed directions. All I wanted was to crawl back into bed and sleep for the rest of the day. "We're here," Mori announced softly, patting my head. "Make sure you go eat something and take some pain killers before you pass out again, okay? If you need anything just call me."

The thought of eating made me want to puke again. "I'll try," I replied, opening the car door. Igarashi stood on my porch, arms folded over his chest like an angry mother. My legs moved slowly, like I was wading through waist deep water. "Please don't lecture me right now," I mumbled, almost crawling up the stairs.

Igarashi slid his arm around my waist, helping me to stand. "Don't worry, I'll save my lecture for after you've eaten and are more awake." The smell from the kitchen was both appetizing and disgusting. Being hungover is confusing my senses. Igarashi pulled out a chair for me at the table, and retrieved a plate full of breakfast items, like eggs and sausage.

Each bite stuck in my throat. Keep it down. Just keep it down. I'd already taken the pain killers that had been set out for me. Halfway through the plate, I pushed it away and laid my head on the table. "I can't eat anymore," I said. Time for bed.

The sound of a voice recording broke the silence. Loud music was muffled in the background, but someone was crying. Then, my own voice, raspy from crying, started to talk. "You're such an idiot, Nana! I wanted you to… choose me! Serinuma isn't the one who's devoted all her time to you! Serinuma isn't the one who's house you sneak into and steal food from! Did all those nights of conversation and sex mean nothing to you? Do I mean nothing… to you? I don't understand! Why can't you just once look at me the way you did at her when she walked into the room? I… I love you. And you don't love me back. What am I supposed to do? How am I supposed to…" The voice stopped, and a door opened. "M-Mori… I-"

The voicemail ended, and I sat in my chair completely stunned by the message. "I sent that?" That part was still very fuzzy to me. Mori's friends had encouraged me to tell Nana how I felt, and I must have gone up there to do that. "To you?" Relief flooded through me. Had that been actually sent to Nana, our friendship could be totally ruined.

"I already knew you were in love with him, Kari," Igarashi started, shaking his head. "But I had no idea that the two of you had gone as far as…" He couldn't bring himself to say it. Instead, he smacked me on the back of the head. "Are you out of your mind? How could you let him talk you into that? What if you get pregnant?" He's always been the most responsible.

My eyes were wide with surprise. He's jumping ahead of all the finer details. "We used protection. I'm on the pill and Nana has condoms—"

He narrowed his eyes. "That isn't the point! Do you two ever think about anyone else? How do you think I feel knowing that my two best friends have been sneaking around behind my back?" Igarashi huffed and pulled up the contacts on his phone. "I can't believe you two!"

Is he calling? I reached out and tried to grab the phone, but he moved out of reach. "Igarashi! Don't! Nana didn't want you to know!" He'll blame me for letting it slip! He'll know that I went out with some other guy and got drunk! I can't face Nana right now. "Please! I don't want to see him!"

"Oh, you don't?" Igarashi asked, keeping the phone well out of my reach.

The sound of phone ringing made us both freeze. That's his ringtone. I know because I had been the one to change it as a prank, and he chose to keep it. Nana stood in the doorway to the kitchen, holding a bag of fresh doughnuts. That had been a ritual thing for us. He brought me them on Saturday mornings when his parents weren't working, as an excuse to get out of the house. "What the hell is going on?" He asked, a panicked expression on his features. "Kari, why don't you want to see me?" Nana's tone held so much disappoint and sadness.

No. No, no, no. How much of that conversation did he hear? My heart dropped to the floor and a lump grew in my throat. How do I explain what I said? The only sound in the kitchen was Nana's phone still ringing from the call. Neither me nor Igarashi could come up with anything to say. I'd never seen Nana so heartbroken before. In one night, in one stupid moment, I might have drove a wedge between the two most important people to me.


	6. Author

I am still working on creating the next chapter for this story! It will be up in a few weeks!

To the guest who left the last review, I think you are confusing Kari and Kae Serinuma. Kari is my original character while Kae is the main girl in the anime. This is Kari's story that goes on around the main story line. I completely agree that Kae Serinuma should be with mutsumi.

I'm sorry if you got confused but Kari is not Kae. She is not meant to replace Kae. Kae is still appears in this story (which is the reason that Nana and Igarashi ditched Kari in the beginning). Kari is a childhood friend of Igarashi and in turn, Nana, when nana and igarashi become friends.


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